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By Lisa Larson, LMFT | Pacific Counseling and Trauma Center
The Roots of Shame
In my practice, I’ve wrestled with how best to help clients move beyond the unrelenting shame and low self-worth that come from caregivers who were unable to love and value them. It often seems as if these clients can’t outrun the “program” their parents gave them internalized beliefs like “I’m not lovable” or “I’m not good enough.” Even when using activated Brainspotting to clear trauma and negative cognitions, I noticed that shame stubbornly persisted. To truly heal, my clients needed to reconnect with something deeper their soul, which I define as the unchanging, sacred, and spiritual core of one’s innermost being.
Healing the Soul’s Identity
“Soul or spiritual trauma causes all good to be absent for a time, during which a kind of horror submerges the soul, characterized by an absence of light.”
— Simon Weil
Developmental trauma often causes a kind of death of the soul’s identity, giving rise to pain-based identities and self-hatred. Clients may begin to define themselves by their trauma, believing they are shameful, unworthy, or broken. These soul-wound stories shrink their dreams, limit their lives, and reinforce the false belief that their perpetrators were right that they are bad or undeserving. Our task as therapists is to help clients rediscover that light to use Expansion Brainspotting to guide them into an embodied remembering of the goodness and beautiful nature of their souls. A “Soul” Spot is a Brainspot in the visual field designed to connect clients with a deep, embodied experience of the inherent goodness of their own nature. Some clients prefer calling it a “True Self” or a “Higher Self" Spot.
This Expansion frame offers clients especially those without inner resources a powerful corrective attachment experience with Self and is profoundly effective in healing deep shame and worthlessness.
Expansion Frame for “Soul” or “True Self”
Spots
1. Ask your client what they want said about them at their Celebration of Life after they have passed.
2. Ask them to list the soul’s characteristics they want to be remembered for, one word at a time. (Write down the list.)
3. Read the list back and ask where in their body they feel the truth of their soul or true self’s goodness most strongly.
4. Ask clients (only those with resources) who they can think about to believe this more strongly (Higher Power, beloved ancestors, friends, family, etc.)
5. Find the Eye Position (Brainspot) that correlates with the body sensation and Mindfully Process.
6. Some clients may prefer to double spot the negative core beliefs or “program” in addition to the Soul or True Self Expansion Spot.
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